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5 Reasons why Brady will be an only child

March 05, 2012
DEPLOYMENTS
  • We are not 100% certain if/when Travis will deploy. He has been deployed for the past 5 years. 
  • I was induced 10 days early so Travis could be there for Brady's birth
  • Travis deployed on our 7 year anniversary. Brady was 3 weeks & 1 day old.
  • I raised Brady by myself for 6 months. 14 weeks at home, then he went to daycare. All of our family is in Michigan, I lived in California. 
  • The deployment we survived with Brady was non-combat. Who knows who/where will will be at war next. 2 children AND worrying about my husband? No thanks.
  • The thought of raising Brady and another child alone, away from family, friends and help with another child gives me anxiety. Brady is an amazing child, what if the next one isn't? A 1 year old and a 3 year old. Alone? No thanks.
VACATIONS 
  • Vacationing just the 2 of us rarely happened. actually, it really didn't happen at all. Add two or more children into the mix and we won't be going far or spending much money.
  • Siblings always fight on vacations. Only children get to bring a friend. Which would you rather have? I liked bringing my friends. 

UNDIVIDED ATTENTION 
  • AKA spoiling Brady!
    • The good, responsible, lesson-teaching spoiling. Not spoiled rotten.

INCOME 
  • Moving every 2 to 3 years means I will never have a stable, permanent job. It's stressful. We aren't poor or struggling, but adding another child, another move and another period of time without a job can be trying. 
PLANNING 
  • Some people get a calendar out to see when they'll be fertile. 
  • We have to get a few consecutive year calendars out to plot when Travis will be in the same zip code, when we will be moving, when he will be deploying, how old the next child would be if/when he deploys. Oh, did I lose you?
If you prefer top 10 lists over top 5 lists, here are 5 more reasons for you:

NAMES
  • Naming Goose and Maverick (dogs) was hard enough. Naming Brady was even harder. We don't like any other names. Brady the 2nd would just be weird.
TEMPER 
  • Brady was an amazing baby and is an amazing toddler. 
  • What if the next kid sucks? 

COMPETITION 
  • As an only child, I obviously haven't experienced sibling rivalry, but I think being a witness of it rather than being a part of it is even worse. It's disgusting the things I've seen or heard siblings compete about. 
  • All siblings have rivalry whether they admit it or not. The ones who don't admit it are the worst. 
  • Sibling rivalry sucks. For the kid, for the family, for everyone involved. 
  • Who will get married first? Who will have the first baby? Who will have the second baby? Who will...WHO CARES?

PREGNANCY
  • My pregnancy was easy, I was rarely hormonal (even Travis said so) but I had severe edema that began around 4 or 5 months. Being swollen is extremely uncomfortable. 
  • I gain weight easy. More than 'average' weight gain + swelling = miserable
  • During the c-section (refer to link above) and 2 weeks after the c-section sucked. Sucked can't doesn't even begin to explain it. 

YOU 
  • We have decided not to have another child because
    • You asked us before Brady was born when we would have another
    • You tell us Brady needs a friend and that the only friend he apparently can have is a sibling 
    • You don't believe us when we say we are not having another 
    • You don't understand raising a child by yourself with a deployed husband and no family around
    • You keep asking us when we are going to have another child 
    • You tell us you're planning on having another and try to make us feel bad by saying that. We are able. We don't want to. 



6 comments:

  1. LMFAO!! I love it! You know the best thing? Even though I have 3, I still pretty much agree with the entire list! ESPECIALLY the sibling rivalry part, and the vacation part, and the deployment part, and - well yeah, pretty much every point you made! LOL

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    1. haha i would love to have more and i give kudos to you and everyone else who has more than one. i'm not a workaholic, but i love my work and, i'm a little selfish with wanting to balance everything. hope to be stationed near you soon :(

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  2. I get it! I would really love to have another baby but I love spoiling Evelyn rotten and I feel like I dont know if I could be this great of a parent to two kids. Plus the idea of 2 kids and a deployment sounds...horrible! The closest we could ever be stationed to family is 7 hours and right now we're 33 hours away from family..its doesnt sound like fun. We're giving ourselves 3 years before we decided for sure but I agree its hard enough with just one.

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  3. I'm grateful for being an only child! I am sure Brady will be too. Who I am today is shaped by hours spent using my imagination, reading, drawing, spending time with adults, and learning to socialize with kids but never rely on them. Having my mother's undivided attention was also a plus :) Brady is being shaped to be a well behaved and independent little man!

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  4. Bravo for you! I wish more people would only have one child and FOCUS on it. Some people hoard kids the way other people hoard objects. I know a family who have SEVEN children. It's ridiculous! How can two people give enough love and attention to an army of children? It's their life, so whatever, but in my opinion, less is more. The financial consideration is huge. Back in the "old days" it wasn't as expensive to raise a family. I don't know how people manage these days. Being a responsible, attentive, involved parents is easier with less children. I am glad you wrote this post!

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